“Hello, I’m Shellie’s new boyfriend and I’m out of my mind. If you so much as talk to her or even think her name, I’ll cut you in ways that’ll make you useless to a woman. ”

“She doesn’t quite chop his head off.She makes a Pez dispenser out of him.”

“DWIGHT:Stay smart. Stay cool. It’s time to prove to you’re friends that you’re worth a damn. Sometimes that means dying. Sometimes it means killing a whole lot of people.”