All Quotes By Tag: Humour
“When the road ahead seems impossible, start the engine”
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“Free your mind from routine, keep your brain somewhere else”
“Never say no to now”
“Life is like yoga; the only way you can enjoy it is by relaxing into any position you happen to find yourself in.”
“Do you know where your breakthrough begins? Your breakthrough begins where your excuses ends.”
“If ur laptop doesnt smell like fire then ur losing.”
“In a traditional German toilet, the hole into which shit disappears after we flush is right at the front, so that shit is first laid out for us to sniff and inspect for traces of illness. In the typical French toilet, on the contrary, the hole is at the back, i.e. shit is supposed to disappear as quickly as possible. Finally, the American (Anglo-Saxon) toilet presents a synthesis, a mediation between these opposites: the toilet basin is full of water, so that the shit floats in it, visible, but not to be inspected. […] It is clear that none of these versions can be accounted for in purely utilitarian terms: each involves a certain ideological perception of how the subject should relate to excrement. Hegel was among the first to see in the geographical triad of Germany, France and England an expression of three different existential attitudes: reflective thoroughness (German), revolutionary hastiness (French), utilitarian pragmatism (English). In political terms, this triad can be read as German conservatism, French revolutionary radicalism and English liberalism. […] The point about toilets is that they enable us not only to discern this triad in the most intimate domain, but also to identify its underlying mechanism in the three different attitudes towards excremental excess: an ambiguous contemplative fascination; a wish to get rid of it as fast as possible; a pragmatic decision to treat it as ordinary and dispose of it in an appropriate way. It is easy for an academic at a round table to claim that we live in a post-ideological universe, but the moment he visits the lavatory after the heated discussion, he is again knee-deep in ideology.”
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“That craptastical, gutless, son-of-a-cactus-humping butt monkey!!”
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“If you cannot find an element of Humour in something, your not taking it seriously enough.”
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“Rose took my nose, I suppose,” he repeated; the bubble of phlegm in his throat made a disgusting crackle. “And it really blows.”
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“A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.”
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“Not going to walk me to the door?” I asked, pretending to be shocked at his lack of gallantry.”Of course I am. many would think that a bonny lass such as yerself wouldst be able to stay out of trouble for a distance of fifteen feet, but I know better.””Did you just use the words yerself and wouldst in the same sentence? You can’t be a pirate and a courtier at the same time, Dev. It just isn’t done.”
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“I can’t forget things, or ignore them-bad things that happen,” I said. “I’m a lay-it-all-out person, a dwell-on-it person, an obsess-about-it person. If I hold things in and try to forget or pretend, I become a madman and have panic attacks. I have to talk.”
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“…There are too many idiots in this world. And having said it, I have the burden of proving it.”
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“You’re kidding,” Shane said. “Do you think I want to visit Crazy McTeeth in his lair of insanity?””No,” Claire said, “but I’m pretty sure you won’t like it if I go alone when I just kind of promised to be with you. So…?””Right. I’ve been missing Nutty McFang anyway.””Stop making up names for him.””What about Count Crackula?””Just stop.”
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