“… fantasy is not practice for what is real—fantasy is the opiate of women.”

“He wasn’t aware of it but when he smiled he looked like an amiable bear. When he didn’t smile he didn’t look amiable”

“True Wit is Nature to advantage dress’dWhat oft was thought, but ne’er so well express’d;Something whose truth convinced at sight we find,That gives us back the image of our mind.As shades more sweetly recommend the light,So modest plainness sets off sprightly wit.”

“I have always been a huge admirer of my own work. I’m one of the funniest and most entertaining writers I know.”

“It’s common platitude that knowledge is neutral but every now and then it would be useful if it was on your side and not theirs.”

“There are two ways to dislike poetry: One is to dislike it; the other is to read Pope.”