“Santa Claus has nothing to do with it,” the latke said. “Christmas and Hanukah are completely different things.””But different things can often blend together,” said the pine tree. “Let me tell you a funny story about pagan rituals.”

“I just wish this social institution [religion] wasn’t based on what appears to me to be a monumental hoax built on an accumulation of customs and myths directed toward proving something that isn’t true.”