“And just then Damon stepped out of the coat closet, and at the same time Aunt Maggie tripped him neatly and said, “Bathroom door beside you,” and picked up a vase and hit the rising Damon over the head with it. Hard.”

“Come on, it’s an American tradition. Apple soup? Mom’s homemade chicken pie?’ She chuckled in spite of herself, then winced. ‘It’s apple pie and Mom’s homemade chicken soup. But you didn’t do badly, for a start.”

“Yeah, tell me I’m a bottle of single malt scotch, she thought. That’s the way to my heart.”

“Why do people always assume that volume will succeed when logic won’t? – Damon”