“Biblical, Talmudic, or Koranic literalists remind me of children wrinkling their noses at Belon oysters and asking for more Chef Boy-E-Dee. They want the world to be as simple as they are.”

“I wish I could recommend the experience of not being killed to everyone.”

“Often you don’t know whether you’re the hero of a romantic comedy or the villain on a Lifetime special until the restraining order arrives.”

“This is one reason people need to believe in God—because we want someone to know us, truly, all the way through, even the worst of us.”