Quotes By Author: Bill Watterson
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“That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!”
“Isn’t it sad how some people’s grip on their lives is so precarious that they’ll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth?”
“Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess.”
“I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.-Calvin”
“Hey Susie Derkins, is that your face, or is a ‘possum stuck in your collar?”
“I’m a 21st-century kid trapped in a 19th-century family.”
“I’m not a vegetarian! I’m a dessertarian!”
“Yakka foob mog. Grug pubbawup zink wattoom gazork. Chumble spuzz. I love loopholes.”
“Calvin:”It says here that ‘religion is the opiate of the masses.’…what do you suppose that means?”Television: “…it means that Karl Marx hadn’t seen anything yet”
“The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that’s even worse”
“I wonder if you can refuse to inherit the world.”
“[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble.] Calvin: Ha! I’ve got a great word and it’s on a “Double word score” box! Hobbes: “ZQFMGB” isn’t a word! It doesn’t even have a vowel! Calvin: It is so a word! It’s a worm found in New Guinea! Everyone knows that! Hobbes: I’m looking it up. Calvin: You do, and I’ll look up that 12-letter word you played with all the Xs and Js! Hobbes: What’s your score for ZQFMGB? Calvin: 957.”
“From now on, I’m not doing anything I don’t want to do! The world owes me happiness, fulfillment and success…. I’m just here to cash in.”
“Calvin: Why are you crying mom?Mom: I’m cutting up an onion.Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.”