All Quotes By Tag: Sarcasm

“the [coat] rack above his head like a javelin.On the other side of the door was Jace. He blinked. “Is that a coatrack?”Jordan slammed the coatrack down on the ground and sighed. “If you’d been a vampire, this would have been a lot more useful.””Yes,” said Jace. “Or, you know, just someone with a lot of coats.”

“Are you insinuatin’ that my daughter is a liar?””Oh, no, not at all. I’m saying your daughter is a liar. Surely you can appreciate the difference.”

“They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit,” Valkyrie said. China glanced at her. “They’ve obviously never met me.”

“It’s now very common to hear people say, ‘I’m rather offended by that.’ As if that gives them certain rights. It’s actually nothing more… than a whine. ‘I find that offensive.’ It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. ‘I am offended by that.’ Well, so fucking what.”[I saw hate in a graveyard — Stephen Fry, The Guardian, 5 June 2005]”

“It’s sarcasm, Josh.”“Sarcasm?”“It’s from the Greek, sarkasmos. To bite the lips. It means that you aren’t really saying what you mean, but people will get your point. I invented it, Bartholomew named it.”“Well, if the village idiot named it, I’m sure it’s a good thing.”“There you go, you got it.”“Got what?”“Sarcasm.”“No, I meant it.”“Sure you did.”“Is that sarcasm?”“Irony, I think.”“What’s the difference?”“I haven’t the slightest idea.”“So you’re being ironic now, right?”“No, I really don’t know.”“Maybe you should ask the idiot.”“Now you’ve got it.”“What?”“Sarcasm.”

“Awww,” Minho said. “That’s almost as sweet as that time she slammed the end of a spear into your shuck face.”

“You are your mother’s trueborn son of Lannister.””Am I?” the dwarf replied, sardonic. “Do tell my lord father. My mother died birthing me, and he’s never been sure.””I don’t even know who my mother was,” Jon said. “Some woman, no doubt. Most of them are.” He favored Jon with a rueful grin. “Remember this, boy. All dwarfs may be bastards, yet not all bastards need be dwarfs.”And with that he turned and sauntered back into the feast, whistling a tune. When he opened the door, the light from within threw his shadow clear across the yard, and for just a moment Tyrion Lannister stood tall as a king.”

“Ask me no questions, and I’ll tell you no fibs.”

“I’m sorry. I use my rapier wit to hide my inner pain.”

“I turned to Dionysus. “You cured him?””Madness is my specialty. It was quite simple.””But…you did something nice. Why?”He raised and eyebrow. “I am nice! I simple ooze niceness, Perry Johansson. Haven’t you noticed?”

“By the Angel,” Jace said, looking the demon up and down. “I knew Greater Demons were meant to be ugly, but no one ever warned me about the smell.”Abbadon opened its mouth and hissed. Inside its mouth were two rows of jagged glass-sharp teeth.”I’m not sure about this wind and howling darkness business,” Jace went on, “smells more like landfill to me. You sure you’re not from Staten Island?”

“I don’t do what I’m told, but I might do what you want if you ask me nicely.”

“You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm.It’s really funny.”

“It’s fascinating. You know all these words, and they’re all English, but when you string them together into sentences, they just don’t make any sense.”

“Are you always a smartass?’Nope. Sometimes I’m asleep.”