All Quotes By Tag: Humor

“It takes a lot of time to be a genius. You have to sit around so much, doing nothing, really doing nothing.”

“Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.”

“There’s no need to clarify my finger snap,” said Magnus. “The implication was clear in the snap itself.”

“If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn’t brood. I’d type a little faster.”

“Where is Wood?” said Harry, suddenly realizing he wasn’t there.”Still in the showers,” said Fred. “We think he’s trying to drown himself.”

“If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?”

“But-” Maia, still looking at Alec and Magnus, broke off and rasied her eyebrows. Simon turned to see what she was looking at – and stared.Alec had his arms around Magnus and was kissing him full on the mouth. Magnus, who appeared to be in a state of shock, stood frozen. Several groups of people – Shadowhunters and Downworlders alike – were staring and whispering. Glancing to the side, Simon saw the Lightwoods, their eyes widen, gaping at the display. Maryse had her hand over her mouth.Maia looked perplexed. “Wait a second,” she said. “Do we all have to do that, too?”

“Sebastian just smiled. “I could hear your heart beating,” he said softly. “When you were watching me with Valentine. Did it bother you?”“That you seem to be dating my dad?” Jace shrugged. “You’re a little young for him, to be honest.”“What?” For the first time since Jace had met him, Sebastian seemed flabbergasted.”

“People, generally, suck.”

“If you are a student you should always get a good nights sleep unless you have come to the good part of your book, and then you should stay up all night and let your schoolwork fall by the wayside, a phrase which means ‘flunk’.”

“The easy confidence with which I know another man’s religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.”

“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.”

“If you want to catch beasts you don’t see every day,You have to go places quite out of the way,You have to go places no others can get to.You have to get cold and you have too get wet, too.”

“I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.”

“My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the heck she is.”