All Quotes By Tag: Humor

“As long as we don’t die, this is gonna be one hell of a story.”

“Are you always a smartass?’Nope. Sometimes I’m asleep.”

“Write what you know. That should leave you with a lot of free time.”

“It’s like learning to ride a unicorn. You never forget.”

“The last thing I ever wanted was to be alive when the three most powerful people on the whole planet would be named Bush, Dick and Colon.”

“Space is big. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the chemist’s, but that’s just peanuts to space.”

“Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they’d lock us up?”All the time.”

“Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don’t have time for all that.”

“God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players [i.e. everybody], to being involved in an obscure and complex variant of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won’t tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.”

“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure. ”

“Puns are the highest form of literature.”

“He cleared his throat and held up one hand dramatically.“Green grass breaks through snow. Artemis pleads for my help. I am so cool.” He grinned at us, waiting for applause. “That last line was four syllables.” Artemis said. Apollo frowned. “Was it?” “Yes. What about I am so bigheaded?” “No, no, that’s six syllable, hhhm.” He started muttering to himself.Zoe Nightshade turned to us. “Lord Apollo has been going through this haiku phase ever since he visited Japan. Tis not as bad as the time he visited Limerick. If I’d had to hear one more poem that started with, There once was a godess from Sparta-” “I’ve got it!” Apollo announced. “I am so awesome. That’s five syllables!” He bowed, looking very pleased with himself.”

“I know all those words, but that sentence makes no sense to me.”

“Sometimes you remind me a lot of James. He called it my ‘furry little problem’ in company. Many people were under the impression that I owned a badly behaved rabbit.”

“Rachel: You’re a half-blood, too?Annabeth: Shhh! Just announce it to the world, how about?Rachel: Okay. Hey, everybody! These two aren’t human! They’re half Greek god!…They don’t seem to care.”