All Quotes By Tag: Funny

“There are few things more mysterious than endings. I mean, for example, when did the Greek gods end, exactly? Was there a day when Zeus waved magisterially down from Olympus and Aphrodite and her lover Ares, and her crippled husband Hephaestus ) I always felt sorry for him), and all the rest got rolled up like a worn-out carpet?”

“Good plan,” Freddy was saying. “Let’s get some decent sleep. Tomorrow we can shake our gravy asses into town and do some sluething.”

“Sir Henry fixed him with a keen eye.’Odd name, Tom Skatt – eh?”Thats right”You don’t think we could be related?’Tom looked up at his great-great-great-uncle and smiled.’I don’t think so”No,’ grinned Sir Henry “no, of course not”

“She needed Andrew Simpson Smith, it was that simple. And he had spent his life training to help people like her. Gods. “Okay, Andrew. But let’s leave today. I’m in a hurry.””Of course. Today.” He stroked the place where his slight beard was beginning to grow. “These ruins where your friends are waiting? Where are they?”Tally glances up at the sun, still low enough to indicate the eastern horizon. After a moment’s calculation, she pointed off to the northwest, back toward the city and beyond that, the Rusty Ruins. “About a week’s walk that way.” “A week?””That means seven days.””Yes, I know the gods’ calendar,” he said huffily. “But a whole week?””Yeah. That’s not so far, is it?” The hunters had been tireless on their march the night before. He shook his head, an awed expression on his face. “But that is beyond the edge of the world.”

“Dwarfs were not a naturally religious species, but in a world where pit props could crack without warning and pockets of fire damp could suddenly explode they’d seen the need for gods as the sort of supernatural equivalent of a hard hat. Besides, when you hit your thumb with an eight-pound hammer it’s nice to be able to blaspheme. It takes a very special and strong-minded kind of atheist to jump up and down with their hand clasped under their other armpit and shout, “Oh, random-fluctuations-in-the-space-time-continuum!” or “Aaargh, primitive-and-outmoded-concept on a crutch!”

“There is little more I can add short of dissecting the man, or going into intimate details such as the modest proportions and slight southeasterly curvature of his manhood.”

“A good approach is to allow one dream per novel. Then, in the final revision, go back and get rid of that, too.”

“I have found the secret KEY to success…All I need to do now is…To find the DOOR…”

“When you’re writing what you love, it’s the most fun you can have with your clothing still on, unless of course, you write naked.”

“Sometimes, when it’s going badly, she wonders if what she believes to be a love of the written word is really just a fetish for stationery. The true writer, the born writer, will scribble words on scraps of litter, the back of a bus tickets, on the wall of a cell. Emma is lost on anything less than 120gsm.”

“All trademarks, company names, registered names, products, characters, mottos, logos, jingles and catchphrases used or cited in this work are the property of their respective owners and have only been mentioned and or used as cultural references to enhance the narrative and in no way were used to disparage or harm the owners and their companies. It is the author’s sincerest wish the owners of the cited trademarks, company names, etc. appreciate the success they have achieved in making their products household names and appreciate the free plug.”

“I love working with my hands. My writing is rough, my paper bruised with ink stains.”

“In the morning sow thy seed, and in the evening withhold not thine hand: for thou know not whether shall prosper, either this or that, or whether they both shall be alike good.”

“The greatest futility! says the congregator, “The greatest futility! Everything is futile!” What does a person gain from all his hard work- At which he toils under the sun? A generation goes and another cometh forth, but the earth remains the same.”

“As thou know not what is the way of the spirit, nor how the bones do grow in the womb of her that is with child: even so thou know not the works of what makes all.”