“Her smile created chaos in his heart every time and it always messed up his mind. But it was also the same thing, which every time silenced the storms and calmed down every demon inside him which always tried to tear him apart.”

“Too often we only identify the crucial points in our lives in retrospect. At the time we are too absorbed in the fetid detail of the moment to spot where it is leading us. But not this time. I was experiencing one of my dad’s deafening moments. If my life could be understood as a meal of many courses (and let’s be honest, much of it actually was), then I had finished the starters and I was limbering up for the main event. So far, of course, I had made a stinking mess of it. I had spilled the wine. I had dropped my cutlery on the floor and sprayed the fine white linen with sauce. I had even spat out some of my food because I didn’t like the taste of it.“But it doesn’t matter because, look, here come the waiters. They are scraping away the debris with their little horn and steel blades, pulled with studied grace from the hidden pockets of their white aprons. They are laying new tablecloths, arranging new cutlery, placing before me great domed wine glasses, newly polished to a sparkle. There are more dishes to come, more flavors to try, and this time I will not spill or spit or drop or splash. I will not push the plate away from me, the food only half eaten. I am ready for everything they are preparing to serve me. Be in no doubt; it will all be fine.” (pp.115-6)”

“Without the mess, who treasure the mercy of the Maker?”

“My life before him was so simple and decided, now after him…It’s just…After.”

“It was a mess, but it was a happy, cozy mess. A mess of lovely, largely happy memories. I felt lucky to have them, despite the disorder of it all…”

“No matter how messy your situation is, God can still have mercy upon your life.”

“Others can’t always define your true identity. They see what they ‘want’ to see but beyond your mess, God sees the beauty He created and still thinks it’s good!”

“You must admit I have a right to live in a pigsty if I want.”

“What you are is a fucking tragedy, Simon Snow. You literally couldn’t be a bigger mess.”He tries to kiss me, but I pull back- “And you like that?””I love it.” He says”Why?””Because we match.”