“When people read his books they have an uncontrollable desire to hang the author in the town square. I can’t think of a higher honor for a writer.”

“The Wit of Cheats, the Courage of a Whore,Are what ten thousand envy and adore:All, all look up, with reverential Awe,At crimes that ‘scape, or triumph o’er the Law:While Truth, Worth, Wisdom, daily they decry-`’Nothing is sacred now but Villainy’- Epilogue to the Satires, Dialogue I”

“If there is anything that links the human to the divine, it is the courage to stand by a principle when everybody else rejects it.”

“You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn’t that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena.”

“Don’t waste your time with explanations: people only hear what they want to hear.”