All Quotes By Tag: Humor

“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don’t know the answer”

“He can run faster than Severus Snape confronted with shampoo.”

“Mr. Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people’s business.Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr. Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git.Mr. Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor.Mr. Wormtail bids Professor Snape good day, and advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball.”

“Is it true that you shouted at Professor Umbridge?””Yes.””You called her a liar?””Yes.””You told her He Who Must Not Be Named is back?””Yes.””Have a biscuit, Potter.”

“Never memorize something that you can look up.”

“When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.”

“There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.”

“Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying ‘End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH’, the paint wouldn’t even have time to dry.”

“When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity.”

“Death’s got an Invisibility Cloak?” Harry interrupted again.”So he can sneak up on people,” said Ron. “Sometimes he gets bored of running at them, flapping his arms and shrieking…”

“Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.”

“Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter?””Yes,” said Harry stiffly.”Yes, sir.””There’s no need to call me “sir” Professor.”The words had escaped him before he knew what he was saying.”

“Jesus!” Luke exclaimed.”Actually, it’s just me,” said Simon. “Although I’ve been told the resemblance is startling.”

“Be careful about reading health books. Some fine day you’ll die of a misprint.”

“Have you ever noticed how ‘What the hell’ is always the right decision to make?”