All Quotes By Tag: Church

“The world does not give money to those who spend 24hrs church everyday praying for financial miracles.”

“God has given both church goers and non-church goers equal time”

“On the church vaulting above was the clock-face of eternity, void of number and serving as its own hand, only one black finger was pointing and the dead wanted to tell the time by it.”

“It was a strange feeling going into a church I did not know for a service that I did not really believe in, but once inside I couldn’t help a feeling of warmth and security. Outside there were wars and road accidents and murders, striptease clubs and battered babies and frayed tempers and unhappy marriages and people contemplating suicide and bad jokes, but once in St. Martin’s there was peace. Surely people go to church not to involve themselves in the world’s problems but to escape from them.”

“A person’s faith goes at its own pace. The trouble with church is the service. A service is conducted for a mass audience. Just when I start to like the hymn, everyone plops down to pray. Just when I start to hear the prayer, everyone pops up to sing. And what does the stupid sermon have to do with God? Who knows what God thinks of current events? Who cares?”

“Yesterday is the last day of the past. Tomorrow is brimming with hope, so today is meant to lived large. Enjoy your moments!”

“Sećam se da sam jedno jutro video ispred samoposluge nekog popa kako ljušti kikiriki, odmah mi je bilo jasno da neće biti mira na Balkanu.”

“Everyone agrees the celibacy rule is just a Church law dating from the 11th century, not a divine command.”

“I see no reason why church services have to be standard. I’ve discussed this with the man who used to be a pastor here at the Methodist Church in Sebastopol. I told him I saw no reason why, on a certain Sunday morning, if a minister has felt during the week the burden of a topic upon his heart and he knows that it is going to take more than the standard twenty minutes to discuss this thing, why he can’t rise at the beginning of the service and say ‘I have something of special importance this morning so let’s sing just one song, and if you’ll forgive me, I think I’m going to need about an hour to explain it to you.’ I think the congregation would appreciate his candor and give him their attention. If, on the other hand, he does not feel that a definite message has been given him, why not admit it from the pulpit and say, ‘This morning, I’m not going to try to make up something to fill the time. We’ll sing a few extra hymns and go home!’ Why do the services have to begin and end at the same time, and why does everything have to be so rigid?”

“Unless a person can give reasons, there is, literally, no reason why anyone else should take that person seriously. But without reasons, all we are left with is emotional blackmail. We sometimes call it ‘moral blackmail,’ but it has nothing to do with morals, only with the implied juvenile threat of having a tantrum unless everyone else gives in.”

“The Pope would have an easier job than the President of the United States in adopting a change of course. He has no Congress alongside him as a legislative body nor a Supreme Court as a judiciary. He is absolute head of government, legislator and supreme judge in the church. If he wanted to, he could authorize contraception over night, permit the marriage of priests, make possible the ordination of women and allow eucharistic fellowship with this Protestant churches. What would a Pope do who acted in the spirit of Obama?”

“I do not like a high-organized church. I think that as soon as the congregation reaches a level of one hundred or so people, it is time to build a new church. As soon as the congregation gets to the point where you are not on fairly intimate terms with every other person in that church, then you have become a theater where people can attend services. I do not think you can attend a church service. Service is not something which is there to be viewed as if it were a play or a movie.”

“Our government needs the church, because only those humble enough to admit they’re sinners can bring democracy the tolerance it requires to survive”

“It was masturbation, not willpower, that made it possible for gazillions of women to walk down the aisle with their reputation and their hymen still intact.”

“Some women have been faking orgasms for so long that they sometimes fake one when they are masturbating.”