All Quotes By Tag: Abuse

“Believe in yourself that you can create thechange you seek, by accepting things as they are. By accepting the things as they are, you allow yourself to make the right choices.”

“You alone caan create the change you seek. But how? By accepting things as they are, you allow yourself to make apt choices.”

“These tactics are initiated if the abuser wants to explore the possibility of a lasting relationship and if he feels that the particular woman would be susceptible to such tactics.”

“Before the abuser initiates contact with a prospective long-term intimate partner he has already developed some very strong beliefs and attitudes. In his own mind he knows what he needs from an intimate relationship and he is convinced that he is entitled to have these needs met. He is also convinced that these needs outweigh any cost to his prospective partner.”

“You can have a pet zebra and put that zebra into a small cage every day and tell the zebra that you love it, but no matter how you and the zebra love each other, the fact remains, that the zebra should be let out of that cage and should belong to someone who can treat it better, the way it should be treated, someone who can make it happy.”

“If you see something wrong happening in the church, you can either do nothing, or you can do something. And I already tried nothing. I have shared these details because I feel a moral responsibility to do so. Hiding behind the closed doors had done nothing.”

“There is tremendous trauma in the betrayal caused by a perpetual liar as they repeatedly commit psychological abuse.”

“we are threatened with suffering from three directions: from our body, which is doomed to decay…, from the external world which may rage against us with overwhelming and merciless force of destruction, and finally from our relations with other men… This last source is perhaps more painful to use than any other. (p77)”

“Playing the victim role: Manipulator portrays him- or herself as a victim of circumstance or of someone else’s behavior in order to gain pity, sympathy or evoke compassion and thereby get something from another. Caring and conscientious people cannot stand to see anyone suffering and the manipulator often finds it easy to play on sympathy to get cooperation.”

“Do not hold your breath for anyone,Do not wish your lungs to be still,It may delay the cracks from spreading,But eventually they will.Sometimes to keep yourself togetherYou must allow yourself to leave,Even if breaking your own heartIs what it takes to let you breathe.”

“I’ve heard that people stand in bad situations because a relationship like that gets turned up by degrees. It is said that a frog will jump out of a pot of boiling water. Place him in a pot and turn it up a little at a time, and he will stay until he is boiled to death. Us frogs understand this.”

“So often survivors have had their experiences denied, trivialized, or distorted. Writing is an important avenue for healing because it gives you the opportunity to define your own reality. You can say: This did happen to me. It was that bad. It was the fault & responsibility of the adult. I was—and am—innocent.” The Courage to Heal by Ellen Bass & Laura Davis”

“Over time as most people fail the survivor’s exacting test of trustworthiness, she tends to withdraw from relationships. The isolation of the survivor thus persists even after she is free.”

“My dad had limitations. That’s what my good-hearted mom always told us. He had limitations, but he meant no harm. It was kind of her to say, but he did do harm.”

“We must never perpetuate abuse by protecting the abuser. We must expose any abuse, in order to protect the abused.”