All Quotes By Tag: Humor

“Do you really think that I don’t have anything better to do than to spend my time thinking about you? Digging up a little of the goods on Luc Martineau?”Fine lines appeared at the corners of his eyes and he laughed. “Sweetheart, there is nothing little about Luc’s goods.”

“Ben was in his truck, window down, idling at the curb, dark lenses hiding his eyes from her, looking effortlessly big and badass.The way she wished she felt.”

“It is no wonder lesbians love women.”

“Jenny: You didn’t leave?Gareth: Of course I left. I was hungry, and I couldn’t find anything to eat. I bought a loaf and some cheese. And oranges. Wait. You mean you thought I had left. Without saying a word to you. Would I do that?(Jenny nodded)Gareth: Damn it. You know better than most I’m no good at these things but even I am not that bad. Really, Jenny. Why would you believe such a thing of me?Jenny: I don’t know, Maybe because you once told me all you wanted from me was a good shag?Gareth: I said that? (he looked surprised, then contemplative. Then apparently, he remembered and winced) God. I said that? Why did you even touch me?”

“Remember I told you I’ve taken a vow of chastity. You understand what that means, right?Yeah,” he said. “You’re very generous. I think that’s cool.”I didn’t quite get his answer, but I didn’t want to prolong the conversation. […]That’s when it dawned on me what Greg had meant. […] Um, that’s charity, Greg, not chastity.He is so not the right guy for me.(137-138)”

“The Challenge is to pry Bertie loose from Dain and his circle of oafish dengenerates,” Jessica said severely. “It would be far more profitable to pry Dain loose for yourself,” said her grandmother. “He is very wealthy, his lineage is excellent, he is young, strong, and healthy, and you feel a powerful attraction.” “He isn’t husband material.” “What I have described is perfect husband material.” said her grandmother. “I don’t want a husband.” “Jessica, no woman does who can regard men objectively. And you have always been magnificently objective.”

“On November 18 of alternate years Mr Earbrass begins writing ‘his new novel’. Weeks ago he chose its title at random from a list of them he keeps in a little green note-book. It being tea-time of the 17th, he is alarmed not to have thought of a plot to which The Unstrung Harp might apply.”

“How is everything, Nadia,” he said.”It’s hot.” I replied, smiling a little bit.”Never forget,” Nasser said, teasing me. “It’s very hot, Nasser, it’s very hot.”

“Some women do not masturbate for pleasure; they masturbate to make a political statement: to remind us that women do not really need men (or at least not as much and as frequently as every single male chauvinist and every single misogynist believes).”

“If ever there was something she needed to stick around and fight for, Luc was that something.”

“Are you threatening me?” He looked completely outraged at such a thing.“You bet your incredibly attractive and probably hard enough to bounce a quarter off ass I am!” she snapped back.An indescribable look flitted across his face. “You are the most irreverent woman I’ve ever met.”“And you’re the handsomest man I’ve ever seen in my life, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to lick you!” she yelled.”

“Not that I knew who you were until last month. But now that I’ve got you, I’m not letting you go.””You’re not?”Blake stared at her in irritated confusion. What was her game? “Do you think I’m an idiot?” he spat out.”No,” she said. “I’ve just escaped from a den of idiots, so I’m well familiar with the breed, and you’re something else entirely. I am, however, hoping you’re not a terribly good shot.”

“Recent studies have shown that approximately 40% of authors are manic depressive. The rest of us just drink.”

“There ain’t a man in the world cares about a woman’s past until he’s thinking of her in his future.”

“When you have faith in something a lot of other people believe then you a member of the church” said Ceas, “When you have faith in something nobody believes, then you a complete wacko”