All Quotes By Tag: Humour
“No bikinis on a first date.” He nods. “I’m sure that’s a rule. Or should be. For my sisters anyway.”
-
“I wouldn’t have thought that I was heavy enought to lift you.””Leverage,” Stone said. ” You just need to provide… Leverage”
-
“When asked why I don’t believe in God I reply, quite simply, “vaginas”.”
-
“I wasn’t saying whatever they’re saying I was saying. I’m sorry I said it really. I never meant it to be a lousy anti-religious thing. I apologize if that will make you happy. I still don’t know quite what I’ve done. I’ve tried to tell you what I did do but if you want me to apologize, if that will make you happy, then OK, I’m sorry.”
-
“I’m not aspiring to be someone else – If I’m me for the rest of my life then so be it”
-
“Of course I want to kill you,” said Skulduggery. “I want to kill most people. But then where would I be? In a field of dead people with no one to talk to.”
-
-
“I think people would live a bit longer if they didn’t know how old they were. Age puts restrictions on things.”
-
“It is the most fun I’m ever going to have. I love to write. I love it. I mean, there’s nothing in the world I like better, and that includes sex, probably because I’m so very bad at it. It’s the greatest peace when I’m in a scene, and it’s just me and the character, that’s it, that’s where I want to live my life.”
-
“Many obese people spend a significant amount of their energy on suppressing the urge to tell some of the people who are staring at them that they do not eat as much and as frequently as they seem to.”
-
“Jerry Falwell said that the reason that September 11th happened, the reason that God allowed it to happen, was because of certain people in our country. People like, and I’m quoting, ‘the pagans,’ which is a motorcycle group. Feminists; he brought up feminists. […] And I couldn’t believe it, he said that God had actually talked to him and said, these were the people. That was the reason. It was those people, and that was the reason God allowed this to happen. And I thought, ‘That’s odd.’ Because God had called me twelve hours before, and He said the reason He was upset was because of people like Jerry Falwell.”
-
“Morning, noon & bloody night,Seven sodding days a week,I slave at filthy WORK, that mightBe done by any book-drunk freak.This goes on until I kick the bucket.FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT”
-
“A relationship is likely to last way longer, if each partner convinces or has convinced themselves that they do not deserve their partner, even if that is not true.”
“You cannot be truly humble, unless you truly believe that life can and will go on without you.”
“If complete and utter chaos was lightning, then he’d be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armour and shouting ‘All gods are bastards!”
-